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ACT to foster happiness, peace,
prosperity, and tolerance in the Middle East
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Tips for Managers
- Never give me work in the morning. Always wait until 4:00pm
and then bring it to me. The challenge of a deadline is refreshing.
- If it's really a "rush job", run in and interrupt
me every 10 minutes to inquire how it's going. That helps. Or even better,
hover behind me, advising me at every keystroke.
- Always leave without telling anyone where you're going. It
gives me a chance to be creative when someone asks where you are.
- Wait until my yearly review and THEN tell me what my goals
SHOULD have been. Give me a mediocre performance rating with a cost of
living increase. I'm not here for the money anyway.
- If you give me more than one job to do, don't tell me which
is the priority. I like being a psychic.
- Do your best to keep me late. I adore this office and
really have nowhere to go or anything to do. I have no life beyond work.
- If a job I do pleases you, keep it a secret. If that gets
out, it could mean a promotion.
- If you don't like my work, tell everyone. I like my name to
be popular in conversations. I was born to be whipped.
- If you have special instructions for a job, don't write
them down. In fact, save them until the job is almost done. No use confusing
me with useful information.
- Never introduce me to the people you're with. I have no
right to know anything. In the corporate food chain, I am plankton. When you
refer to them later, my shrewd deductions will identify them.
- Tell me all your little problems. No one else has any and
it's nice to know someone is less fortunate. I especially like the story
about having to pay so much taxes on the bonus check you received for being
such a good manager.
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