 |
|
ACT to foster happiness, peace,
prosperity, and tolerance in the Middle East
|
| |
Out of Office Auto Replies
This is a list of the best "Out-of-Office" e-mail
auto-replies. If you know more, please email me.
- I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to
you if I fail to get the position.
- I'm not really out of the office. I'm just ignoring you.
- You are receiving this automatic notification because I
am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received
anything at all.
- Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having
my brain removed so that I may be promoted to management.
- I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless
emails you send me until I return from vacation on 4/18. Please be patient
and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
- The e-mail server is unable to verify your server
connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your
computer and try sending again. (The beauty of this is that when you return,
you can see how many people did this over and over).
- Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been
charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in
your message.
- Thank you for your message, which has been added to a
queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive
a reply in approximately 19 weeks.
- An I, D, I, O, T has occurred, please try later!
- Hi. I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please
wait by your PC for my response.
- I've run away to join a different circus.
- Hi! I'm busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Don't
bother to leave me any messages.
AND, FINALLY, THIS ONE TAKES THE CAKE.
- I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for
medical reasons. When I return, please refer to me as "Lollita" instead of
"Steve"
| |
Back | Home | Next
Up
At Last
Before and After the wedding
Best 10 Answering Machine Messages
Best GCSE answers
Best Lawyer Story
Best Sex Ever
Boss
Bridge to Hawaii
Busted
Call Girl
Californians
Cardiologist's Funeral
Children Stories
Christmas Carols
Chinese ENGLISH
Cleanse my sins
Complex Spelling
Computer Customers Complaints
Computer Terms for Women
Costello Buying a Computer
Court's Disorder
Chinese Detective
Chinese Wisdom
Culture and meaning
Definition of Politics
Definitions of a KISS
The Dial
Don't Take it Seriously
Driving Directions
Effects of Diamonds
Emoticons
Employers' Lingo
Evolution
Extremely Blonde
Five Stars Service
Free Sex
French Cultural Attactions
Frog's Princess Charming
Funny One Liners
Geek Office Slang
Gender Based Conversation Differences
Gender of the Computer
Great Night
Great Dog
Guitly Dreaming
Handsome Man for Lovely Ladies
Heroism in the Mental Hospital
Heroism and Devotion
Here We Are
How Computer Works
How to identify a mad cow
How to identify a rich man
Hotel Bill
Ideas About Wives
If women ruled the world
Issues Françaises De Genre
IT Heights
IT New Year Greetings
Italy vs Europe
Job descriptions
Kids are quick
Kinds of Men
Lost Wife
Love Lust or Marriage
Lover's Picture
Making a Woman Happy
Mexican Oysters
Four Characters Password
Fun in Elevators
Funny Matrimonial Ads
Funny stupid responses
MBA Students
Men & Women Differences
Mental Asylum Selection
Michigan
Murphys Other Laws
My point exactly
Ladies Vs Real Women
Life Saving Preacher
Man and Woman's Communication Skills
Management
Message for girls
Mistakes Twists
Money and Government
Need 710
Never Felt Better
The Mother as a Vending Machine
No offense
One Liners
Only in America
Out of Office Auto Replies
Opposing Traffic
Pappu and his Teacher
Perks of Being of 50
Protocol of Work
Red Ferrari
Rejection Lines
Religion, Royalty & Sex
Salary Increase Request
Smart Answers
Smart Redhead
Smart Parrot
Surgeon and Mechanic
Socrates' Logic
Pascal is Out
The Perfect Couple
Pretty Ugly
Plunging stickman
Powerful Punctuation
Praying for Peace
Questions about Men
Remarkable Philosophy
Rodney Dangerfields Best
Saved
Screen Cursor Movers
Set Her Free
Six Types of Orgasm
Sex and Calories Burned
Side Effect of Alcohol
Signs that you live in the 21st Century
Six ways to catch a lion
Smart Kid
Stranded Internationals
Southern Medical Terms
Super Frog
Teacher Students Jokes
Tech Support
Tenth Husband
Thanks Mom!
True Gentleman
Tweety funny prayer
A Trusted Dog
Understanding Engineers
Volleyball Women
Wandering Bug
A way with words
Wedding Night
When Girls Get Drunk
When You Are Drunk
Why did the chicken cross the road
Why Most Professions Are Dirty
Why Women Live Longer
Wise comparisons
Witty Attorneys
What men and women say mean
Who Enjoys Sex More
Why is Honey Golden
Why Men Die First
Why teachers go crazy
Women's Age Geography
Women, Age, and Stories
Women Humor
World's Fastest
You know you are Lebanese when
You got a Male
You said what
|
