Funny stupid responses

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Funny stupid responses.

• Did you take a bath?"  --> "Why, Is there one missing?"
• "Are you chewing gum?" -->"No, I'm John Smith."
• "I want to buy a dress to put on around the house."-->"Yes, Madam. How large is your house?"
• "What are you going to be when you graduate?"-->"An old man"
• "I spent three years in college taking medicine."-->"Are you well now?"
• Do you say a prayer before you eat?"-->"No, we don't have to. My mother is a good cook."
• "I've got a surprise for you, honey. I brought a friend home for Dinner."-->"Who wants to eat friends?"
• "We are having mother for dinner, darling."-->"Make sure she's well done."
• "I want some rat poison."-->"Should I wrap it up or do you want to eat it right here?"
• "It seems that everything I say to you goes in one ear and out the Other."-->"Well, I guess that's why I've got two ears."
• "May I hold your hand?"-->"No, thanks, It isn't heavy."
• "Does water always come through the roof in this place?"-->"No, sir, only when it rains."
• "When will you straighten out the house, dear?"-->"Why? Is it tilted?"
• "Do you have big plastic bins?"-->"Yes, how many bodies do you want to dispose of"
• "Do these stairs take you to the second floor?"-->"No, you'll have to walk"
• "Now that you're married, you should have some insurance"-->But why? My wife isn't dangerous."
• "I have changed! My mind."-->Thank heaven! Does it work better now?"
• Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?-->Customer: What other colors do you have?

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