Stranded Internationals - Oh, I kid American Women.
On a chain of beautiful deserted islands in the middle of
South Pacific, the following people are stranded:
Two Italian men and one Italian woman. Two French men and one
French woman. Two German men and one German woman. Two Greek men and one Greek
woman. Two British men and one British woman. Two Bulgarian men and one
Bulgarian woman. Two Japanese men and one Japanese woman. Two Chinese men and
one Chinese woman. Two Irish men and one Irish woman. Two American men and one
American woman.
One month later, on these absolutely stunning deserted islands
in the middle of nowhere, the following things have occurred:
One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian
woman.
The two French men and the French woman are living happily
together in a ménage a trios.
The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of
alternating visits with the German woman.
The two Greek men are sleeping together and the Greek woman is
cooking and cleaning for them.
The two British men are waiting for someone to introduce them
to the British woman.
The two Bulgarian men took one look at the Bulgarian woman and
started swimming to another island.
The two Japanese have faxed Tokyo and are awaiting
instructions.
The two Chinese men have set up a pharmacy, liquor store,
restaurant, and laundry, and have gotten the woman pregnant in order to supply
employees for their stores.
The two Irish men divided the island into north and south and
set up a distillery. They do not remember if sex is in the picture because it
gets somewhat foggy after a few liters of coconut whiskey. However, they're
satisfied because the British aren't having any fun.
The two American men are contemplating suicide, because the
American woman will not shut up and complains relentlessly about her body, the
true nature of feminism, what the sun is doing to her skin, how she can do
anything they can do, the necessity of fulfillment, the equal division of
household chores, how sand and palm trees make her look fat, how her last
boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her nicer than they do, and how her
relationship with her mother is the root cause of all her problems, and why
didn't they bring a damn cell phone so they could call 911 and get them all
rescued off this Godforsaken deserted island in the middle of freaking nowhere
so she can get her nails done and go shopping.
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